In today's world, divorce rates are extremely high ( I believe somewhere around 50%) which I do think is too high; however, I do not think that people should not be allowed to get divorced. In certain circumstances I believe that it may be necessary for two people to obtain a divorce whether it be for the safety of one of the partners or because the couple is truly unable to work out their problems. Two people should not be forced to stay in a marriage if they are miserable and there seems to be no solution. I also think that the couple needs to explore every avenue possible in order to fix their marraige before moving on. Marriage is not something that should not be taken lightly and not something that should just be rushed into. I think that a lot of people become swept up in the emotions of falling in love and tend to marry before they know everything they need to about their partner. The website I chose for this week includes some statistics about marriage and divorce. I was shocked by a few of the numbers. Divorce Facts

I think that the most important aspect of this week's lesson was on Domestic Violence. This is an issue that is a lot bigger than most people realize and happens a lot more often than we wish to think.  I do think it is also important for people to realize that while many of the victims of domestic violence are women, there are times when men are the victims of the abuse.

Much of the discussion about domestic violence was focused on why women do not leave the situation and I think it is important to realize that many women are too scared to leave the situation, especially in cases of severe abuse the woman may fear for her life. There are also many other reasons why a woman will not leave. Many times the abuser will tell the woman that she is worthless and the woman will believe him. Due to this, she does not believe that she deserves better so there is no point in leaving the relationship. There are so many reasons that a woman would not leave the relationship and it is hard to make any accusations unless you have been in the situation.

The link I chose this week is statistics and facts about domestic violence and abuse. I chose this because I was astounded by a lot of the numbers and thought it would be interesting to share. Abuse Facts

I think one of the most important aspects of this week's lesson is the parent-child relationship. I was fortunate to have a very good relationship with my parents and I have always felt that I could talk to them about anything.; however, I know in some cases this type of relationship does not exist. When a child is going through physical and emotional changes, it is important for them to know that there is at least one person who is always there for them. I think building this relationship begins at a very early age and continues for the rest of your life. Creating this relationship does not have to involve doing spectacular things or spending lots of money, but rather something as simple as having a daddy daughter date night once a week. This gives the child a chance to spend time with the parent or parents and form that trust and support network. The website I found for this week has a list of several simple things that help to foster a good child-parent relationship that are all easy to accomplish.
Child-Parent Relationship

Growing up, I do not remember ever having a physical punishment, such as spanking, as an affect of doing something wrong. I believe this was effective for my sister and I. Looking back, I do not remember being punished often but when I was, I was always made aware of what I had done wrong and my parents would usually take something away such as watching my favorite tv show that night or having a play date with a friend. This was very effective for me and is what I hope to do with my children. Losing something that I looked forward to always taught me very quickly not do that what I had done wrong again. I also do not feel that spanking or hitting in any way is appropriate because many young children get the idea that it is okay to hit people then. While this is not the case for all youngsters, I have experienced first hand a few who say its okay to hit because mommy and daddy spank them when they are bad. I think that the most important part of a punishment is making sure that the child knows that they did wrong and to talk to them about it so that they understand why it was wrong. Without this full understanding, a child is very likely to repeat that same behavior.

The website I found this week is from the Dr. Phil website and lists several effective punishment techniques. I like this website because he breaks it down into age groups and lists what is and is not effective for that range.
Discipline Techniques

Learning more about religion and contraception was very interesting and got me thinking about the pros and cons of contraception in today's world. I believe that contraception is not only okay but sometimes necessary in today's world. There is so much in the media about sex that people are becoming sexually active at younger and younger ages. While I am not condoning that this is okay, if it were not for the use of contraception, I believe that there would be many more teenage pregnancies in the world than there currently are. I understand the church's teachings, however, we no longer live in a world where everyone waits until they are married to have sex. Even in that case, I think that the couple should be able to decide when they wish to have children and how many they would like to have. Many of the households today cannot support too many children, in which case is it fair to bring those children into this world?  I think something of this nature is very personal and it is up to the individual to decide. I do not think it is right for anyone to tell them what is and is not right.

The website I found about this issue is very good. The main page does not say much but at the bottom there are links to the moral issue of contraception as well as the different religious views of contraception.
Contraception

The part of this week's lecture on cohabitation was very interesting to me. As I had mentioned in the discussion, one of my cousins lived with her husband for ten years before they got married and I thought it was great because they were able to learn new things about each other (good and bad) that they did not know by only seeing each other a few times a week on dates. They both knew that they eventually wanted to get married and have a family; however, they felt for them it was best to make sure their relationship was stable enough and that they really were meant for each other.

After seeing this example in real life, I do not think I would ever discourage myself or anyone else against cohabitation. I believe the reason why the divorce rate in our country is so high is because so many people rush into marriages and do not really know the other person that well. Then as time goes on, they begin to learn all these things about them that they may not be thrilled about. I am not saying that living with someone before marriage is for everyone. I realize that it may go against some people's religious beliefs and/or personal beliefs; however, I do think it is a good way to really get to know someone before making a lifelong commitment to them.

The website I found for this week explains a few reasons why people decide to live together before getting married as well as reasons why it is detrimental to the relationship. The article also includes points of view of parents, educators and friends which I found to be interesting.
Cohabitation

The section of the lesson I found particularly interesting this week was that on the dangers of premature sexual activity. I thought that the ten items listed in the book are very important for people to know and be aware of.  Many young people do not realize the emotional effects that can come along with having sex too early. As I mentioned in my discussion response, my high school had a very good sex education program that went over pretty much everything you can think of when it comes to sex. My teacher was wonderful (she herself had a baby when she was only 18 and could relate very well to use) and answered any and all questions that we had. The only downside to the program was that I believe it was too late in our high school career. All senior students were required to take it as their health class; however, by that time, it was somewhat irrelevant for a majority of the students. If we had been required to take it sophomore year, I think there would have been a lot more people that could have avoided some of the guilt they were carrying by becoming sexually active too early.

I decided to find a website related to this topic for this week. This website also lists 10 effects of premature sexual activity; some are the same as those in the book but a few differ a little bit. I like this website because I feel that it has good explanations as well as examples of what the author is talking about.
Premature Sexual Activity

One of the most interesting aspects of this week's lesson was the communication differences between the genders. I think this is something that everyone realizes is there but tends to forget where there are conversation conflicts with someone of the opposite sex. Personally, when my boyfriend tells me that there is nothing going on or does not want to talk about something, I tend to take it personally and assume that I did something wrong. After reading this chapter, I realize that is not the case at all he just does not feel that those things are important to talk about. He often says to me that when I call he expects me to have something to say to him, when sometimes I am just calling to see how his day is and that annoys him. He wants our conversations to always have a point. After reading this chapter I understand that is because men talk in a report fashion, which means they are always talking to a point. Reading this was very helpful to me just in understanding my own relationship. I think that this is a very valuable essay for all people to read and could help to avoid many potential arguments.

The website I chose this week describes this basic idea in very simple terms. It explains that women search for meaning in what people say and men take it for what it is. It also gives a few examples in order to better understand.
Gender Communication

This week I learned a lot about the different marriage customs of different religions. Through the readings, lectures and exploring the different website, I learned that a lot of the ideas I had about specific religions were not at all accurate. I know in the discussion many people wrote that they were surprised by the beliefs of Islam and what a calm and peaceful religion it is.  I too was surprised by this and I think it is due to the stereotype the United States gives Islam today. I think the media has a way of portraying the idea that anyone who is Islam is automatically bad, but I now know that these "bad" people are the exception to the rule. I think that was something that I always knew in the back of my mind but after reading about the ways of their religion, I know for sure.

I also found it very interesting that a lot of religions are a lot more laid back then most Christian faiths. I am not a very religious person and do not know much about religion aside from what people have told me and what I have read. Through this information, I get the feeling that when it comes to the rules of marriage, Christians, and Catholics especially, have very firm rules and guidelines.

I am a Quaker and found it interesting to read up on some more information on that. I knew a little bit about the Quaker ceremony and what it entailed because my parents were married in a Quaker meeting house and my cousin had a half Quaker, half Catholic ceremony. It was very interesting to me though to learn more about it. The only thing I ever really knew for sure was that no one officiated the ceremony because we believe that the only one who has the power to do that is God.

My website this week was one I found that gave a more detailed explanation of the Quaker ceremony and beliefs. I found this to be interesting because it is my religion and I enjoyed learning more about it.
Quaker Marriages

This week I learned a lot about the religious traditions of marriage that I did not know previously. It was very interesting to me that the Catholic church did require that an official marriage be consumated and that aspect was actually brought from another culture. I also found it very interesting that they did in fact believe that marriages should be reciprocal. The job of both the man and woman was to be devoted to the other.

Doing the intimacy activity made me realize that I have what would be defined as intimate relationships with many more people than I thought. My definition of intimacy has also been in a more physical aspect; I never thought of it in terms of intellect at all. By completing that chart, it showed me that I really am a lot closer with more people in my life then I had originally thought.

The website I found for this week breaks down the meaning of love into simple terms that are similar to those that were in the lecture notes for this week. I thought it was a good website because it is very simple and easy to understand. It was written to help younger people understand what love is and that it is something that goes farther than attraction between a man and a woman.

Love Website